Beloved Child is in the final month of deciding about colleges. Over the weekend she heard from 3 more schools, two put her on the wait list and one out right said she was not admitted. I did not realize how much of my own ego was invested in her getting in, not because I want her to go to any one particular school, but because, who on earth would reject my smart, wonderful child? She got into 5 schools, 4 of which she is not truly interested in, which leaves her feeling as though she really has only one choice and the wait list schools.
In truth, I think the one school that admitted her and that she would consider going to is the right school. It has the programs, extra-curriculars and travel opportunities that she wants, it is not overly far from home, but certainly far enough, and has economic diversity as well as a large enough student body to have other kinds of diversity as well.
And in the midst of this, I try to not put MY hopes, fears and choices in her face. I ask, nicely, "how are you feeling about all of this?" "What do you think/feel about your choices?" and she says, "Mom, asking how I am feeling is just making me feel worse. Stop it. " Okay. Well. Um. So, I have to shut up, for now, and wait to be asked for an opinion, and be silently supportive somehow. Ice cream?
We went to Florida last week for 3 days. It was great. We walked on the beach, ate (outside!!), shopped and talked. I am cherishing these opportunities to be close before she leaves in the Fall. Tomorrow is back to school, the last term. Graduation is 2 months away. Silent support, lots of love and opinions when asked. This is my life today, right now.
